I wrote a few poems lately, some of them sad, in fact most of my poems have this sad tone, what can I say, I write my ‘drumsticks’ as I call them based mostly when I’m moody, angry, sad, so it get to a stage where I just have to go through a catharsis, writing poems or short writings help me release these energies burning inside.
Sometimes after writing, when I’m in a more ‘normal state’, I read what I write and wow, I get surprised, the sentence construct, the rhymes, the use of words, the choice of words, surprises me, makes me wonder if I was really the one who did it, Life is like that sometime.
Everything hasn’t really been going well for me lately though, sometimes I feel like giving up other times I feel the burden weighing on me so greatly that all I wanna do is just curl up and…..
Die. Lol, funny though when I think about it sometimes, but it’s real, depression is real, but funny enough Im able to reflect more, my reflections, my thinking pattern, my equilibrium processes all become enhanced in this state of low joy and slow death. Lol, maybe it’s a sort of drug for me, because I find it hard to write any poem, design Graphics or conjure anything of any sort when I’m in a normal state, the inspiration isn’t just there, the feeling, the emotional energy, the tears, the feeling of death close by, a mental state of loneliness, all these in a way provide a sort of environment, really optimum to produce something, maybe I’m just crazy.
Anyways, I know I’m not trying only person who feels this way, maybe you are like me, if you are, what do you advise? Probably a stroll to the doctor for a few checkups will do? Lol, just kidding.
Everyone has a driving force for everything, this is my own driving force, my own flawed beauty; before the comments and sad notes start flowing in, here is an excerpt of one my works titles The Wanderer,
I ran to the West seeking happiness, East beamed down on me hopelessly, North wondered who’s child was this, I found myself South, dejected and sad… #TheWanderer
Got anything to say?